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The Onion

@TheOnion

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America's Finest News Source. https://t.co/SbVS1vuwnU

The Onion

The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

Kremlin Agent Not Even Going To Bother Trying To Compromise Trump Staffer Who Will Be Forced To Resign In Few Month…

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The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

For more world-renowned reportage, visit .

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For more world-renowned reportage, visit .
The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

A Timeline Of Trump’s Relationship With The Press

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A Timeline Of Trump’s Relationship With The Press
The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

Child Protective Services Take 80 Million Children Into Custody After Discovering No One In Country Fit To Be Paren…

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The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

5 Things To Know About TRAPPIST-1


The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

Study: Bees Capable Of Complex Learning #WhatDoYouThink?

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Study: Bees Capable Of Complex Learning  #WhatDoYouThink?
The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

How Hollywood Can Address The Gender Gap


The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

Weird Black Dot Actually Part Of Bowl

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Weird Black Dot Actually Part Of Bowl
The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

In today's news: An ex-Citigroup executive, Jerry Jones, and a 30-Million-Year-Old species


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3 weeks ago

Hotel Lobby Treated To Entirety Of Child’s Song Catalogue During Check-In Process

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Hotel Lobby Treated To Entirety Of Child’s Song Catalogue During Check-In Process
The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

Did You Know?


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3 weeks ago

God Knocked Unconscious By DirectTV Satellite

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God Knocked Unconscious By DirectTV Satellite
The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

Matt Damon Loses $500 To Guy Who Promised Professional-Looking Headshots

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Matt Damon Loses $500 To Guy Who Promised Professional-Looking Headshots
The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

Editorial Cartoon: "Oscars So Right"

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Editorial Cartoon:
The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

Last Remaining Ivory-Billed Woodpecker Really Squandering Species’ Final Weeks

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Last Remaining Ivory-Billed Woodpecker Really Squandering Species’ Final Weeks
The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

Sunday Magazine:

Sunday Magazine:
The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

Warm, Syrupy Pleasure Coursing Through Man’s Veins After Big Hit Of Mattress

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Warm, Syrupy Pleasure Coursing Through Man’s Veins After Big Hit Of Mattress
The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

Man Struggling To Pierce Orange Peel With Fingernail Under Impression He Could Kill If He Had To…

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The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

‘Wall Street Journal’ Reintroduces Nudes After Failed Yearlong Experiment

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‘Wall Street Journal’ Reintroduces Nudes After Failed Yearlong Experiment
The Onion The Onion
3 weeks ago

"We are troubled that transmissions vital to homeland security could have been captured by President Trump’s staff.…

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